Q: Why do people come for counseling and therapy?

R: For a vast range of issues and circumstances that are inherent in the human dilemma.

Q: The human dilemma?

R: The challenges and opportunities that arise from the human condition. These are essentially the perennial questions, which can be summarized as Who am I? Where am I going? and what is the purpose of life? These basic questions can be expressed in a variety of ways, but they boil down to three.

The first question can manifest in the niggling problems of life that have to do with emotionality, confidence, the search for understanding and meaning, relationship difficulties, confusion about life expectations - that kind of thing.

The second question concerns your life trajectory, stage of life, thresholds and demands that are psycho-biological or instinctive, the fulfillment of roles and complementary questions to do with value and self-worth.

The third question reaches towards the spiritual realms or at least to the question of higher power, numinous experience and directly addresses the fear of death and thereby all fears.

Q: As a counselor or therapist are you engaged in a different way according to which of these three questions forms the basis of the client's concerns?

R: Yes. Essentially there are four relationships: counselor, therapist, depth psychotherapist and spiritual mentor or guide. As a psycho-spiritual therapist I expect to flow easily between these four definitions of my role and function, depending on what is required.

Q: From different clients?

R: From different clients or from the same client at different times. The human predicament is so rich and varied that an individual may find themselves in some personal issue that drops them suddenly into a more profound level of enquiry.

Q: Can anyone do it? What I mean is, since the abilities of the therapist seem synonymous with being a caring human being to a large extent, what are the peculiar resources that are the exclusive domain of therapists?

R: In a way you are right: a therapist is a caring human being. But there is a bit more to it. Plus, caring can involve challenge, deep acceptance, really being able to listen, empathy, profound receptivity, a pronounced resistance to solving problems and a holistic sensitivity. Couple all of these with skill and consideration, study, understanding and a repertoire of techniques and a consistent meditative or contemplative disposition reinforced by consistent practice and you have it mostly covered, I think!

Q: I followed most of that, but what do you mean by holistic sensitivity?

R: For some reason I always think of a story I heard once about a Tibetan lama who seemed to manage great feats of physical prowess, skimming just above the ground and traversing immense distances, defying gravity-that kind of thing. When asked to explain how he managed to perform these feats, a monk replied, "He breathes through his knees."

Holistic sensitivity is, for example, listening with one's whole body, being open enough to receive unconscious communications, practicing non-judgmentally with complete awareness, and allowing the senses and supra-senses to flow freely in the body, so you pick up from the other person as much of the truth of their present condition as is possible.

BLOG entry #113

This article by Richard Harvey was originally published at http://www.therapyandspirituality.com/articles/  and it is part of an ongoing retrospective series of blogs. ‘Counseling and Psychotherapy: Qualities of the Practitioner' was first published in 2011.