Finding the Right Therapist or Counselor For You
by Richard Harvey on 02/10/17
This short article aims to offer guidance
in selecting a therapist or counselor in the psycho-spiritual field. Although
aimed at psycho-spiritual therapists and clients much of what is written here
applies to seeking a therapist or counselor of other psychological
orientations.
If you are seeking a practitioner to work
with, you should try to be clear about what you are seeking. Think of therapy
and counseling as consisting of four levels: problem-solving or symptomatic
counseling, therapy motivated by a presenting life issue (like a relationship
or marriage breakdown, career and finances difficulties, facing a change in
life or emotional crisis), depth psychotherapy which lasts longer and is likely
to be more profoundly life-changing and, finally, the spiritual journey.
In so far as psycho-spiritual psychology is
part of the spiritual field a number of misunderstandings have arisen from
flimsy thinking. If you are a student, a client or a convert seeking guidance
from a therapist, a guide or a spiritual teacher you are entitled to clarity.
Just because spirituality is concerned with the in-visible, numinous realms of
light, energy and inner reality doesn't mean that we cannot talk about it with
precision, grace and vividness.
So, when you are approaching a practitioner
of psycho-spiritual psychotherapy do not hold back. Ask challenging questions
about their world view, their beliefs and their prejudices. Beware of
references to teachers, religions, scriptures, yogis and rishis etc.; if it's
wisdom, it should come directly from the practitioner.
Second, be clear about where the
practitioner is on the spiritual journey; ask for definition, ask again if
anything isn't clear, because you won't go further than the spiritual guide
while you are in their care, so you can know immediately how far you're going
and if this potential will satisfy you by asking these kinds of questions.
Third, remember this field is full of
practitioners who don't know as much as they make out. Flaky ideas about
spiritual wisdom, higher knowledge and non-verbal communication are all very
well, but they may simply mask the fact that the practitioner doesn't know,
isn't wise enough yet or doesn't know how to say it!
One more thing: many practitioners today
wear several hats. But a good therapist is not necessarily a good teacher and
vice versa, any more then a good author on a subject -- any subject -- is
necessarily a good practitioner of what he writes about. So remember the roles
of individual therapist, course leader and author reflect independent talents
in your potential therapist.
Accolades, accreditation, training count
for something, but empathy, presence and compassion are hard to learn in any
training. So don't take anything for granted simply because the practitioner is
trained and accredited. Well-qualified therapists exist who are mediocre,
ineffective or no good at all and under-qualified ones exist who are
tremendously gifted and innovative.
The rules are to listen and hear, use your
instinct and intuition, and trust your gut-feeling when you are interviewing a
potential therapist-guide. And remember that it is you who is interviewing the
practitioner, not the other way round; you have nothing to prove to them.
Ultimately, offer it up to a higher power, because if it is the right person
for you to work with you will know, you will feel it and it will come together.
Richard Harvey, Psychotherapist, Author and
Spiritual Teacher, makes the connection between counseling and psychotherapy
and spiritual growth. He speaks particularly to those who are looking for more
than they have found in therapy. And offers guidance to those seeking to
undertake the inner journey - guidance free of dogma and grounded in what many
of us experience as the "messiness" of our personalities.
Visit his website http://www.therapyandspirituality.com/ for
inspiring ideas and practical help, and see http://www.therapyandspirituality.com/human-awakening.html for
an overview of his approach.
BLOG entry #82
This article by Richard Harvey was originally published at http://www.therapyandspirituality.com/articles/ and it is part of an ongoing retrospective series of blogs. ‘Finding the Right Therapist or Counselor For You.’ was first published in 2011.