Spirituality and Personality
by Richard Harvey on 06/09/17
If you have been
involved in either therapy or counselling, or spirituality and meditation, in
recent years you have probably encountered two basic, polarized viewpoints
concerning personality. Essentially it amounts to this: therapists are
pro-personality (and its improvement through healing neurosis etc.) while
spiritual teachers proclaim personality a big waste of time, since neurotic or
not, you are more than your personality.
This is not
particularly surprising, since therapy and counseling tend to be concerned with
the individual, while spiritual practices are concerned with higher matters.
But it does lead the novices and beginners into a quandary where they are faced
with the decision of what to do about personality. On the one hand, therapy
could be an expensive, futile effort to better the personality, whereas, on the
other hand, spiritual practice may offer an excuse to leave personal problems
behind, with the justification that you are moving on to more lofty concerns.
In the extensive time
I have been engaged in therapy and spirituality I can say that I have
discovered the answer to this controversy! And I don't say it without
reluctance and a certain caution, since my answer is liable to offend both camps
-- therapists and spiritual teachers. Perhaps my answer is
less a rejection or abandonment of one viewpoint for another and more of a
synthesis. This may be an answer of the best kind - the kind that doesn't
marginalize or dismiss anyone's experience or viewpoint. For my answer, while
radically new and innovative, does not fundamentally disagree with either point
of view, but considers each appropriate to the complex, total unfolding process
of our human nature and potential.
My answer to the
dilemma is to propose a third band of human experience. I call this "the
authentic self" and since I am not using any unusual words I need to
define this term, because I do mean something specific. The authentic self, in
the way I use the term, is the bridge between the personality and the spiritual
self. It is arrived at usually, but not always, after a lengthy period of
intensive, deep, applied and consistent inner work. This inner work consists of
a journey of self-discovery in which one circumvents the self, becoming
increasingly aware of the conscious and unconscious material that comprises
one's sense of self, or ego. This involves character, which is essentially
defensive strategy or an intelligent, protective reaction to early
conditioning, which becomes increasingly calcified and adapted throughout
adolescence and adult life. Character is composed of the way in which we
survive and protect ourselves from inner and outer stimuli and ultimately avoid
really meeting life. It creates a self-imposed prison -- limitations in which
we feel falsely safe.
Self-discovery also
involves cultivating our awareness of personality, or the way in which
character (defenses and strategies) is experienced. Both inwardly and outwardly
we erect a barrier to experience -- life events and other people -- which is a
mask, façade or persona which eclipses the real person, or our true nature.
We also raise
emotional and behavioural patterns out of the murky stratum of the unconscious,
out of unawareness, and see just how much our life is lived automatically, as
an automaton without real human response, emotional feeling, resonance, empathy
or even awareness.
The process of
self-discovery involves witnessing, reliving and remembering, practicing
awareness and releasing pent-up emotions, returning the bodymind, through
self-regulating, self-healing and self-referral, to a natural state of balance,
ease and relaxation, and opening to insight and experience. In the short-term
the experience is enriching, enlivening and full of dramatic changes. In the
long-term through achieving personal wholeness, soul nourishment and insights
we reach a threshold, a bridge, a chasm - all variously transitional metaphors
that signify a quantum leap, a fourth dimensional change that I have termed
"the threshold of transformation".
The significance of
this threshold, and what distinguishes it from all the changes that have gone
before, is that is effects are irreversible -- it is a step from which there is
no going back. Once taken, this step across the threshold will lead you to the
condition of authenticity and intimacy with your own true nature.
This insight renders
the controversy about personality redundant. But it does depend on our ability
to clearly distinguish the psychological from the spiritual.
BLOG entry #99
This article by Richard Harvey was originally published at http://www.therapyandspirituality.com/articles/ and it is part of
an ongoing retrospective series of blogs. ‘Spirituality and Personality’ was
first published in 2011.